This kind of cycle can be a shock; however, it's common when you have a romantic or platonic relationship with someone diagnosed with BPD. 1. I don't like it, but I've learned to live with it and find healthy ways to cope. The difference between a best friend and a favourite person, is related to the intensity of the thoughts that surround this person. I do not have anything to contribute to the world. The favorite person can find themselves being target of smothering affection, dependency . Being a "favorite person" to someone with BPD is typically far more than simply acting as a best friend or trusted confidant; it can be complex, intense, flattering, mystifying and highly rewarding. I find it difficult to explain to anyone who doesn't have borderline personality disorder (BPD) how a favorite-person (FP) relationship works. So what exactly does having a favorite person mean to someone with BPD? Borderline personality disorder (BPD) is a mental health disorder characterized by many symptoms, including chronic challenges with maintaining healthy interpersonal relationships, feelings of low self-worth, impulsivity, and volatile moods. Unfortunately, if that person is busy—or if conflict emerges—anger and the fear of abandonment often become triggered. For example, people with impulsive BPD tend to act without thinking about the consequences. Anyone can have a favorite person! Unfortunately, one of the nine classic symptoms of BPD is having unstable interpersonal relationships, so it's common for people with . I don't think it is an empirically validated construct and I'm not sure how this could be tested. I love you so much, no matter what I ever do or say. A favorite person, however, is the toughest relationship for me to manage. Most of the time it feels like they're my least favorite person honeslty. I also for a long while, used to have Christina as an FP. Hannah, on the other hand, has one main. I'm always stressed and obsessing. When I discovered all of this, it was like a weight was lifted off of my shoulders. 1 As a pattern of strained personal relationships is a hallmark of the disorder, it is no wonder that . Before I was treated, I almost did that myself.. What is a quiet borderline? "Having a favorite person for me is the constant shifting between idealization and devaluation. As someone professionally diagnosed with ASPD, particularly sociopathy, I do have my 'favorite person' and 3 other people I could 'feel' for, out of my wide range of relationships. One person is too much pressure for me. Like many other people with borderline personality disorder (BPD), I had a "favorite person" or "FP." This is used in the BPD community to refer to the person your emotions become dependent upon. 1. Answer (1 of 8): Yes, I do. ), the shifting only goes between the two extremes. Matthias and Vap are my favorite people from Quora (but Vap I invited to quora; he was not from here originally).. I know that you are specifically referring to the widely known phenomenon amongst those with BPD of having a Favorite Person though, so let's look at what that means. A relationship with your favorite person needs to be built on mutual respect and care. A BPD person's favourite person can be anybody: a relative, parent, best friend, lover, or somebody they just met. 11 days ago Yes I understand that but I don't understand attaching yourself to your "favorite person", knowing you're attached to this person in an unhealthy way. A favorite person is one person in a BPD sufferer's life that they cannot function without. People with self-destructive BPD struggle with self-hatred and suicidal thoughts. In most instances, favorite persons are crushes, partners, friends, or other people who the pwBPD . Each highlights a different aspect of BPD. Answer (1 of 5): Yes, a person with bipolar disorder can forget their favorite person. Here are five potential problems with a BPD favorite person relationship: 1. ago ask them what it means to them. My emotions change depending on how she feels or how often I see her. > People with BPD often experience intense attachment to a singl. Sometimes they are combined with a crush, making it easier for me to explain my feelings without sounding crazy. Within the past month, I discovered BPD through research online. Stay tuned. At this point in my life, I'm pretty dependent on her. BPD and Managing the Favorite Person Relationship Order The Borderline Personality Disorder Workbook by Dr. Fox: goo.gl/LQEgy1 The first favorite person video link is added at the conclusion of this video. Related: When Borderline Personality Disorder Makes It Difficult to Trust Others 2. Answer (1 of 6): Sure it is. And within the past week I discovered the concept of "favorite person". One of the hallmarks of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is clinging to a "favorite person" (or "FP"): someone you often hold in the highest regard and trust with your life. Common with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it's often that someone has a minimum of one FP, but a person can have many. I have been very open with her about my BPD, and that she's my favorite person. With much love, I really wish I understood "favorite person" better. I always just get triggered if I have a favorite person, usually a romantic partner. For 24-year-old Georgia Louise, who was diagnosed with BPD aged 21, the people who became her FP were all either romantic partners or her best friends. (and no the term doesn't always have to be capitalized, I'm just doing that for emphasis) To those with BPD, a Favorite Person is someone who they feel a need to be with, an urge they may not even understand or be aware of. Actually, I forgot, but I felt this way (mother figure) about my past therapist too for awhile, but then I found out about FPs and distanced myself. Can you have a favorite person without BPD? What Having a 'Favorite Person' Means to Someone With Borderline Personality Disorder admin September 7, 2021 Borderline Personality Disorder Leave a comment 182 Views For me personally, one of the most challenging aspects of having borderline personality disorder (BPD) is having a "favorite person." Though the concept of having a favorite person is one familiar to a lot of people in the BPD community, others might hear the term and think, "Oh, it's like a best friend."While a… Their tastes can change with their mood swings and levels of awareness. For me, I tend to feel that the world is better off without me and that I am worthless as a person. It's incredibly exhausting and I can't help it. I hope it makes sense. A woman living with borderline personality disorder (BPD) offers advice for how to keep a relationship with your "favorite person" healthy. . In most instances, favorite persons are crushes, partners, friends, or other people who the. I often have people tease me or make comments about how attached I am. But in the cases where I feel no particular attraction to them, romantically or sexually, it's difficult for me to understand and explain my obsession and . It sometimes makes me feel like a faker lol like, im just "situationally bpd". Here's how members of our BPD community define a favorite person: 1. Chronic feelings of worthlessness or emptiness: Although those with BPD feel everything very intensely, we are also empty at the same time. Relationships are central to all of us, but particularly to those along the BPD spectrum. Both M. In the blink of an eye, there is anger or extreme rage, chaos, and escalating negative emotions. However, I do believe that many people with BPD do indeed have a "favorite person" that they cling onto from what I have observed. 4 Relying on someone else for ongoing validation and attention seemingly lessens the need to utilize appropriate regulation skills. Didn't even realize I did this until a couple months ago but I've been obsessing over people for years. I know that you are specifically referring to the widely known phenomenon amongst those with BPD of having a Favorite Person though, so let's look at what that means. In the borderline personality disorder (BPD) community, the term "favorite person" (or "FP" for short) is used to refer to that person in your life you feel like you can't live without — someone you might have an intense emotional dependence on.. My FP happens to be my best friend. When anything changes (the tone of their voice, body language, etc. If you live with borderline personality disorder (BPD), you may have come across the term "favorite person," or "FP" for short. Answer (1 of 6): I'll make my answer as short as possible. Re: Favourite person BPD. When anything changes (the tone of their voice, body language, etc. Summary. First, everything feels good, uplifting, and safe - they might think of you as their favorite person. . The favorite person concept most likely stems from the psychodynamically-oriented theories of BPD. An "FP" (or Favorite Person) is a person who someone with mental illness relies on for support, and often looks up to or idolizes. A Favorite Person is not the same as just someone you really like, no matter how intensely. I do cling on this person as they are a way for me to ge. Emotional Dysregulation Many people with BPD struggle to manage their emotions. I say specifically because it is their job to be informed and they are routinely misinformed. How can you tell if someone is your favorite BPD? and often looks up to or idolizes. Anyone can have a favorite person! Their favourite person becomes the source of their comfort and devotion. I've been stuck without an FP, but I've also been an FP which is a weird sensation . The four types of BPD include impulsive, discouraged, self-destructive, and petulant. In the case of the "favorite person," the individual with BPD prefers one person and wants to spend all their time with them. "V" and I had a very intense and relatively short friendship. Answer (1 of 6): Sure it is. A favorite person is one person in a BPD sufferer's life that they cannot function without. It's like I'm the happiest when they tell me they love me and they are there, but I have self-harming and suicidal . A woman with BPD shares five things to know if you are someone's "favorite person." . You see, Borderline Personality Disorder is highly stigmatized and misunderstood, not only by the general population, but specifically by medical professionals. "Having a favorite person for me is the constant shifting between idealization and devaluation. "H e can make me want to live when I want to die." " My favorite person is the one I don't feel I can . A Favorite Person is not the same as just someone you really like, no matter how intensely. 2. I went home upset and feeling somewhat stabbed in the back, for having this information . Being a "favorite person" is knowing that throughout the struggles you've weathered alongside your friend, you've forged a powerful connection with them; a bond strong enough to last a lifetime. I wasn't diagnosed with bpd, but I have definitely experienced having a favorite person or persons. Other than that, I'm okay. A BPD person's favourite person can be anybody: a relative, parent, best friend, lover, or somebody they just met. Being a "favorite person" to a friend with borderline personality disorder is often laughter and love, heartache and tears. > People with BPD often experience intense attachment to a singl. I used to just fly off the handle without a second . ), the shifting only goes between the two extremes. NEVER MAKE ASSUMPTIONS Assumptions are the devil when it comes to having a relationship with a favorite. In this video I discuss what it means to have a favorite person to someone with borderline personality disorder, BPD or emotionally unstable personality diso. Yes, 'favourite person' is a common thing I hear about from other people who have experience with BPD. They might also start pushing away or testing their favorite person to prove the person's loyalty and love. I have done it before and it always ended in an incident of rage because I perceve that my FP had somehow abandoned me, and I went into splitting. Also, I find it really hard because then, I can't work on myself, or tell if I'm improving, if I'm not getting triggered. Thank you, my FP, my best friend, the one person who sees me fully. A couple were folks I just simply idolized, and another was one I looked to as a mother figure. When anything changes (the tone of their voice, body language, etc. My FP was also my best friend "V" (not her real name). Here's how members of our BPD community define a favorite person: 1. You give me hope, you bring me light, you shelter me from the storm inside myself. Vap for a long while was very intense, but it's dulled down of how much I idealize him. They don't understand how I feel like I wouldn't be able to function without that person. I'll never say it enough times, my favorite person, so I hope you never grow tired of these words: thank you. 1 More posts from the BPD community 303 Posted by 7 days ago Small Triumph "Having a favorite person for me is the constant shifting between idealization and devaluation. It is not unheard of that a person with bipolar just walks away from their family either. Common with borderline personality disorder (BPD), it's often that someone has a minimum of one FP, but a person can have many. ), the shifting only goes between the two extremes. For me I just feel obsessed, but I wouldn't call them my "favorite person". I've had my borderline personality disorder (BPD) diagnosis for around three years now, but its only within the past few months that I've experienced one of the common challenges people with BPD. 7 mo. 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